In a lot of ways, I feel like I’ve taken some serious steps back in my yoga journey.
But in the interest of full disclosure, I’ve taken even more staggering steps back in my personal life. The transition to single parenthood took a lot out of me. Kind of knocked me on my butt for about 18 months to be honest. The end of a marriage is a sad sad thing. I’m no longer depressed and I’m starting to get my sparkle back, but there are still a lot of really hard days.
So it’s no wonder my body has suffered as well. I am less bendy than I was three years ago. Less limber. Less strong. WAY less strong.
I am tight in ways I used to be flexible.
I am tense where I need to breathe.
My mind is racing when it needs to meditate.
Lessons on the mat, as I have always found in my 5 years practicing yoga, are also essential lessons for my life.
Lately I have had to embrace almost a complete slowing down in my yoga practice. I am desperately trying to balance my health, and healing some fatigued adrenals means I have to prioritize power-naps and early bedtimes over mat-time.
I miss working up a sweat and I miss the muscle tone and the energy-boost I received from dedicated, intentional practice. I miss taking classes, because I saw huge gains in my strength and flexibility when I had the benefit of 90 minutes with a teacher lighting a fire under my tush. (In the gentle, yoga-mindfulness kind of way, obviously.) I just don’t have the time and energy to practice like that right now.
But I have still found the need to practice in some way throughout the week.
My yoga mat has become a solution to anxiety on hard days when I feel overwhelmed by the eternally unending to-do list of my business or my personal life.
And so I roll it out and I start this album…
I first heard Break of Reality at one of CMOG’s 2300 events last year. And I LOVED them. A cello rock band? Come ON how much cooler can you BE? My favorite song is Storm’s End.
So when I need to relax and slow down my racing mind, I set the timer for 15-20 minutes and put on this album. And I just flow through whatever restorative poses come to my mind… or I stretch what needs stretching (I’m looking at you achy back)… or I gently play around with a pose that helps me feel strong like crow or warrior 3 or wheel or a headstand.
But mostly I just breathe.
My life is never going to stop being chaotic, mostly because that’s life. But also because that’s just not the kind of person I am.
If I’m going to do something I’m going to do it to death and right now that means [trying super hard to keep] balancing creative entrepreneurship and single parenting.
And for the days that have me too tightly wound, lately it’s been the mat and Break of Reality that helps me regain my center.
Like this post? Let me know in the comments if you can relate, and what your favorite de-stress exercise is!